Your favorite restaurant is never what it used to be. Staff shortages are an ongoing issue, food costs are soaring and customer behavior can derail. With so many foodservice professionals under more stress than ever, those of us on the other side of the pallet could use a little refresher on basic etiquette and common sense to make their lives a little easier.
Although we need restaurants, our actions are making it increasingly difficult for people to find satisfying careers in food service. “This is one of the hardest industries to work in, full of thankless days and heartbreakingly hard times, but it’s vital to neighborhood, community, and joy,” says author, executive chef and owner of New York’s The Raging restaurant Chef Xi said. “People forget how lonely and depressed they were when restaurants were closed during the pandemic. Be grateful and be kind, cry out loud, and treat others the way you would like to be treated.”
We spoke to chefs, bartenders, caterers, servers and restaurateurs to find out what they hope you’ll consider doing better this year.
Respect your reservation.
Unless you’ve worked the front desk of a bustling restaurant, you probably don’t know how many endless requests, changes, and customer mistakes people in this position often encounter. So when you make a reservation, please be clear about your requirements and take notes as confirmation.
Of course, changes will happen, but your attitude will be different. For example, if you want to add more people to your reservation, be patient. Remember, the people serving you are human beings, so treat them well.
At the date and time of your reservation, with your entire team, stand Be front and center at the hostess stand and dress appropriately for the space. Failure to do this puts pressure on the delicate house of cards that restaurant reservations represent.
Don’t say you have an allergy just because you don’t like an ingredient.
Roberta d’Elia, chef at UK restaurant Pasta Evangelists, has this plea to customers: “Please don’t say you’re allergic to something just because you don’t like it. We take allergens very seriously and devote extra time to customers who report allergies and care. So if you’re not really suffering from the situation, it takes the pressure off the restaurant staff.”
Also, consider the impact of your special request. Please do not ask the kitchen to “take out” certain ingredients such as garlic from the sauce as these are not made individually but in batches and it is impractical to omit an ingredient from a prepared dish.
If you can afford to eat out, you can afford to tip.
For food service workers, tips are not a luxury, but a necessity. Industry wages are set low, with the rationale that tips make up the difference. According to the U.S. Department of Labor, workers who are legally tipped on the job can only earn $2.13 an hour from their employer.
Standard tip is 15% to 20% of the bill before tax. If you tip at a dine-in restaurant, be aware that your tip may not go entirely to the server, as they often share it with the bartender, waiter, hostess, and food server. You may have even noticed that the menu options include “Kitchen Beer,” making it easy to tip the people behind the scenes.
Many of us get it right. A recent Bankrate survey revealed that more than two-fifths (44%) of U.S. adults typically tip at least 20% at dine-in restaurants. But there are still some people who don’t tip, or don’t tip well, and this is a problem for many in the industry.
Don’t use a raised voice or snap your fingers to get your server’s attention.
If you want better service, here’s a newsflash – this attitude is not the way to get better service. “Before I was a chef, I was a bartender,” Rossi recalls. “When a customer raises their voice or snaps their fingers at me, I become ‘deaf.’ I no longer hear anything they say or ask for.”
Andrew Zimmern, author of The Outdoor Channel’s “Wild Host of “The Game Kitchen,” he’s worked every food service job possible, from dishwasher to executive chef to restaurateur. He despairs of the destruction of civility experienced by customer service workers: “Anyone behind the counter, from airline employees to deli employees, from hotel employees to restaurant employees, is being mistreated today more than ever before,” he said . “Who do these entitled people think they are? Buying a sandwich or a $500 bottle of wine doesn’t give you the right to be rude, disrespectful, behave poorly or raise your voice at others.”
Keyatta Mincey Parker echoed those sentiments. Keyatta Mincey Parker is the chief curatorial officer of Pictures and Cocktails in Atlanta and the founder and executive director of A Sip of Paradise Garden, a community garden for mixologists. She has worked in the hospitality industry since the age of 16, hosting, serving, bartending, managing and frying, as well as running bar projects for restaurants, nightclubs and hotels. What does she want from her customers? “One of my wishes for restaurant patrons is to be kinder to the people who take care of them in these spaces. It takes more effort to be mean, but it takes no effort to smile and be kind.”
She offers a tip for putting yourself in other people’s shoes Advice: “It’s hard to wake up every day and choose a service. Too often, people in our industry are the last stop of the day for our customers, and they’ve been through a lot that has nothing to do with us. But people take it out on us. We are human beings just like you, so please treat us with the same kindness and respect that you would want.”
Have grace when posting about your experience on social media.
“I hope every imperfect moment in a restaurant doesn’t immediately show up on social platforms or consumer websites unless the poster gives the restaurant a chance to correct or make amends,” Calvo said. “I hope guests don’t do things like leave one-star reviews just because they disagree with your dress code policy.”
The experts we spoke with also recommend giving credit to the talent behind Instagram-worthy entrees praise. “There are foodies on social media taking pictures and sharing what they’re eating, but they rarely give any credit to the chef who created the dish,” says Owen. “They use posts to bolster their sense of self, brag about dining out and loving life. But it’s also important to celebrate the chefs themselves and help build their followings. Celebrate chefs the same way you celebrate musicians at concerts.”